Flexible or Indecisive

Am I a personality of Indecisiveness or Flexibility ?.
This is the question that is eating my brain since two weeks.What am I.
Lot of happenings in this month. Lot of important decisions to be made.
Decisions involving my career and my life. Decisions affecting me and my
friends
Decisions involving my parents too. But am I happy with the decisions.
Firstof all am I taking Decisions?? or am I leaving to time to take its
own course.
Lemme attempt to find out ...
Its all started when I joined my job in Bangalore. Till then, I was a
happy-go guy living life as it is.
After joining in Blore for job , I was happy for two months. I went
around for trips,treks with my good friends and everything was totally
fine.
Then I became uncomfortable with the job. I am not exactly sure what
made me uncomfortable.
Was it that all my other friends were enjoying their life with cool jobs
and me getting fried even on weekends.
Or was it that my friend was convincing me every other night that
Regression is junk and development as good.
Or was it that my heart really wanted a cool / development job in big
company ??
Or was it that I wanted to get out of my house , making job-shift as a
reason ?
I really don't know.
But I started disliking my job for reasons which I feel silly now..
I really went weary of my current job in the initial months itself not
because job was bad but due to a lot of other unnecessary factors
Only thing , I felt them unnecessary only a bit late. But I started the
job search and after xsome ups and downs I got one in com1(say).
com1 is in new domain but has the lucratives of big banner and
comfortable job.
I definitely needed some rest and time for myself since my current job
robs both of them.
Then I informed my current company regarding my decision and sort of
declined the profile change offer
which is what exactly I initially wanted. I really didn't give time for
myself to make a decision.
I informed in current company because incase i need to join com1 , i
need to give one month notice.
When I informed my company , I wasn't sure i want to shift my job
(Irony??).
Now I want to stay in this domain itself. So I applied for Com2 which
works in this domain.
I really didn't do well in their interview. Still they are ready to
offer me.
Now Where should I go. Com1 gives good sal and a good brand. Com2 gives
good work domain.
Do I really know what I want. Will I take a decision atleast now ??

The second Indecisiveness/Flexibleness is in Househunt.
I can either stay alone in Whitefield or with a friend in Marathahalli.
I am flexible that i can stay alone or adjust with someone.
I am indecisive whether i really want to stay alone or with someone.
When I was totally unhappy with my current house (sometime last
september/october) I made an emotional
decision that I will stay alone. I took a decision because noone can
pain me when i am alone.
After a long time , after the wounds are healed, after i learnt to
survive dominators,
things were changed to the extent that the room became a happy place to
live.
Then a good friend of mine joined us in our room. Now I have an option
of sharing house in a new place.
Actually that is what exactly I wanted one year back. I wanted him to
come early so that I can move out with him.
I was even praying that he should get job very fast so that I can decide
on house shift !!!.
Now when there is an option of we sharing a house, I am confused.
The option is whether to share with him or go alone to whitefield.
Going alone looks fine when I think of peaceful life, learning a lot for
life like cooking, health, games, Gym.
I can buy things and keep collecting them.
Sharing with him is better because thats is what I really wanted.A good
roommate is definitely is a gift.
I can still in touch with jai and other friends, in touch with city, etc...
But I am confused? In a indecisive ? In other words, I want to keep my
options open. ?????
Anyhow I asked him for a time frame so that i will not waste his
plans.So a quick decision will be made shortly.

God , Please be with me .Give me options only in those things were I can
take proper decisions... :-)

Third thing is the most imp decision to take. This is for life. May be i
will put it on words some time later ...

I'm the man :-)

The awkward first phone call..

The Scene:
The Girl is a 23 year old investment banker, working in New York. The Boy is doing his residency in Boston and was given her number by his mother, who is a friend of the Girl's aunt's brother-in-law's cousin's uncle's wife in Chicago.

Time:
Monday night, 10 pm

Girl: Hello?

Boy: Shit, she's home! Umm, hi! Is this Pooja?

Girl: Speaking.

Boy: My name is Karan. I don't know if you know who I am. God, what if she doesn't know who I am? I don't even know why I'm doing this!

Girl: Oh, you live in Boston, right?

Boy: Yeah. Ok, so she was told about me, that's some relief. I wonder what she was told - "He's a resident, tall, and fair and he graduated from Ivy League school!". God, she probably hates me already!

Girl: Yeah, my mother mentioned you had my number. I can't believe he actually called!

Boy: So, how are you? Oh yeah, that's real original, but what the hell else I am supposed to say- Umm, hi, I don't know you, but do you want to be my wife?

Girl: I'm fine. And you? Ok, this is off to a great start

Boy: I'm good. Ok, think, think! So, I heard you're an investment banker? Oh, that's a real winner. Now I can be a bad conversationalist and an idiot!

Girl: Yes.

Boy: Ok, she is not helping me at all! Where do you work?

Girl: Merrill Lynch.

Boy: Hey, that's a great firm! I sound like a complete moron. I should just hang up except my mother would somehow find out and kill me!

Girl: Yeah, it's a nice place to work. God, this guy sounds like a complete loser

Boy: So... Stall, Stall!

Girl: So you're doing your residency in cardiology? Like my mom didn't tell me that 500 times already!

Boy: Ok, I can handle this... Yeah, I'm in my second year. Alright, now say something else, but what do I say? Do you drink? Cause if you want to marry me, you can't be one of those goody goody Indian girls who think that if they kiss a guy, they've practically gone all the way So, what do you like to do in your free time?

Girl: Umm... get wasted... Oh, you know, hang out with my friends, go to movies…

Boy: Where do you like to hang out in NY?

Girl: Shit, what am I supposed to say? This guy could be some religious freak! I can't say bars - I'll say clubs, you can go to clubs and not drink... Oh, sometimes we go to the movies, or there's a couple clubs that are good... That was good, I made it sound like I like clubs, but I'm not really into them...

Boy: Ok, she goes to clubs, that's a good sign. If she was really religious she wouldn't do that. Yeah? I like to dance also.

Girl: He likes to dance- that's a good sign. He can't be that stiff! So where do you hang out in Boston?

Boy: Should I say it? Alright, I'll say it, what the hell! Umm, the same, bars, clubs, stuff like that.

Girl: He said bars! So he probably drinks. Good sign. I should explore this further... Are there any good bars in Boston?

Boy: Yeah, there are some nice ones, I mean, I'm not a huge drinker, but I like having a good time. Ok, that gives the impression of someone who enjoys drinking but is not an alcoholic - pretty good, if I do say so myself

Girl: That sounds really positive. This guy sounds kind of cool. But if he's so cool why is he calling me? Shouldn't he have a girlfriend? Or not need to call random girls his mother tells him about? God, what if he's completely ugly? Yeah, me too. Although I hope my parents never find out.

Boy: Yeah. I know exactly what you mean.

Girl: Ok, so he didn't freak out at the living a double life reference- another good sign. I just wish I knew what he looked like... So...

Boy: Or she could be really fat with a huge mustache. Well, there's only one way to find out! So… I know this sounds a little crazy, but I'm visiting some friends in NYC next weekend and I wonder if you'd want to get together for coffee sometime.

Girl: Coffee. That's totally safe. If he's totally nasty I can have a quick espresso and run like hell! Yeah, that sounds great.

Boy: Alright that went pretty well. Coffee's pretty harmless. And who knows, maybe she'll be cool. Now I have to get the hell out of this conversation... So I have your e-mail, should I just e-mail you soon and we can figure it out?

Girl: E-mail is sooo much better than the phone. Thank God for e-mail! Yeah, just e-mail, I check it all the time at work, so - God, this is getting painful

Boy: Alright, I'll e-mail you soon. Meaning in two days, cause I don't want to look too desperate, but at the same time I don't want to look like I'm trying not to look too desperate

Girl: Cool. Well, I'm glad you called. I think...

Boy: Me too. Well, I'll see you soon. Please be hot, please be hot!

Girl: Alright. Bye. I can't believe he called! Too late to back out now. Besides, maybe he's cool. He didn't sound so bad on the phone.

Boy: Bye. I did it! I am the man. I think she wants me. Yeah, she definitely wants me…

Where do I fit in

The Little Square departed the world and culture of squares and was sent out into the wider world of all sorts and manner of geometric shapes and sizes.

He spent time with circles, orbs, eliptics, rectangles, and triangles, with hexagons and pentagons, and even spent time with those strange and foreign octagons that lived far, far away. As he rubbed together with them, taught them, and spent time with them showing them fascinating new insights and truths, they in turn rubbed back by sharing things with him that taught him and made him better.

He was a happy Little Square.

But by and by, the Little Square’s work was done and he returned home to his world of squares.

What he hadn't realized was that all that rubbing had rubbed off some of his nice, crisp square corners!

He discovered to his surprise, that he was no longer a very square square!

Alas, his shape had changed forever. He was a bit of a circle here, and a bit of a triangle there, and a bit of a pentagon over here. He was even octagonal in some ways!

Well, the squares in his hometown were very dismayed. The Little Square no longer fit in. He was somewhat strange and foreign—other worldly. They no longer understood the Little Square. He tried to fit back in but they shook their heads and wandered away, sick that the Little Square was so troubled and lost.

The once Little Square had returned home and found that he no longer fit into his little square hole. He had become an Oddball...not really fitting in anywhere...not completely.

So he sat down and began to cry. He felt alone, lost, of no use or value...he had no...home.

He was an Oddball, and he would always be an Oddball.

But then, he heard the Voice.

It said, "Stop crying Little Square. I wanted you to become the shape that you are now. Because you are now my shape. I made you an Oddball because I don't want you to fit into that world. You fit perfectly into my world."

"Who are you, Voice?" said Little Square.

"I made you, Little Square." replied the Voice, "And I have shaped you to become an Oddball because I have a very special job just for you."

Little Square was happy once again, and was glad that he was different - an Oddball!

So, he got up and set out to do what the Voice had called him to do...to go and help other Oddballs find their way to the Voice.

There is always a better way

Read this story somewhere . Worth duplicating on www ...


A blind boy sat on the steps of a building with a hat by his feet. He held up a sign which said: “I am blind, please help.”

There were only a few coins in the hat.

A man was walking by. He took a few coins from his pocket and dropped them into the hat. He then took the sign, turned it around, and wrote some words. He put the sign back so that everyone who walked by would see the new words.

Soon the hat began to fill up. A lot more people were giving money to the blind boy.

That afternoon the man who had changed the sign came to see how things were. The boy recognised his footsteps and asked, “Were you the one who changed my sign this morning? What did you write?”
The man said, “I only wrote the truth. I said what you said but in a different way.”

What he had written was: “Today is a beautiful day and I cannot see it.”

Do you think the first sign and the second sign were saying the same thing?

Of course both signs told people the boy was blind.

But the first sign simply told people to help by putting some money in the hat. The second sign told people that they were able to enjoy the beauty of the day, but the boy could not enjoy it because he was blind.

The first sign simply said the boy was blind. The second sign told people they were so lucky that they were not blind. Should we be surprised that the second sign was more effective?

There are at least two lessons we can learn from this simple story.
The first is: Be thankful for what you have. Someone else has less. Help where you can.

The second is: Be creative. Be innovative. Think differently. THERE IS ALWAYS A BETTER WAY!

The Broker ....

Long back i decided to keep track of Novels, I read.In my Previous Post Read to live,not live to Read I listed the books and the motivation behind them. So adding to the list is "The Broker" by one of my favorite authors John Grisham. I like Grisham , though most of my friends are not. His style is different. A creative naration. For example The Testament is a real classic novel thought the story can be told in exact 2 lines. But its a good read.

The Broker is cool. First time , I thing Grisham ventured in to spy rackets, mosards etc. Usually it used to be Archer's or ken follet's stuff. But Grisham was really good in his plot. There is/was a Broker. A power Broker. He had his empire, built by him. As in real life it too collapsed when he left for jail. There was a security scandal on his name. Shut into jail for 20 years. Then suddenly CIA want to digout the truth. so they get a pardon and ship him off to Italy. They watch him closely to find out which of China\Russia\Isreal\Saudi will kill him first. Then the broker's instincts were back and he is back into the game.
Fairly done by Grisham. Possibility of picking up couple of Italian language and names of dishes .
One unbelievable thing (or atleast my heart didn't agree) is that the Neptune was cracked by pakistanis ;-) . But what heck ? They too have brains and belong to our subcontinent. We were same once .

ok do read Broker to spend ur valuable time ...

I am currently reading Digital Fortress

So my new list says
Michael Crichton

1. Jurassic Park
2. The Lost World
3. Congo
4. TimeLine
5. Airframe
6. The Andromeda strain
7. Disclosure
8. Sphere
9. The Terminal man
10.The Great Train robbery
11.State of Fear
-----------
John Grisham

1. A Time to Kill
2. The Firm
3. The pelican Brief
4. The Client
5. The Partner
6. The Testament
7. The Brethren
8. The Summons
9. The Last Juror
10.The Broker
11.
-------------

Jeffrey Archer

1. Not a penny more Not a penny less
2. Kane and Abel
3. The prodigal Daughter
4. Shall we tell the President
5. First Among Equals
6. A matter of Honour
7. Honour among Thieves
8. The Eleventh Commandement
9. Sons of fortune
10.

----------
Eric Segal
1. The class
2. Love Story
3. Oliver's Story
4. Doctors
5. Acts of Faith
6.


-----------------

Sidney Shelton
1. If tomorrow Comes
2. Memories of midnight
3. The Other side of the midnight
4. Tell me your Dreams
5. Master of the Game
6. Nothing Lasts for ever
7. Rage of Angels
8. Morning noon and night
9. Dooms day conspiracy
10.

--------------
Ken Follet
1. Jackdaws
2. The Eye of the Needle
3. The Third Twin
4. Codeto Zero
5. Hornet Flight
----------------
Dan Brown
The Da Vinci Code
Angels and Demons

----------------
Frederick Forsyth

1. The Day of The Jackel
2. The Devils Alternative

-------------------
Robert Ludlum

1. The Bourne Identity
2. The Sigma Protocol

------------------
James Patterson

1. Along came a spider
2.
------------------------

Others:
1. The Rule of Four : Ian Cladwell and Dustin Thomason
2. The touch of a Stranger :
3.

to be added.........

Things only women can understand !!!

Why it's good to have seven pairs of black shoes.

The difference between cream, ivory, and off-white.

Crying can be fun.

A salad, diet drink, and a hot fudge sundae make a balanced lunch.

Why discovering a designer dress on the clearance rack can be considered a peak life experience.

The inaccuracy of every bathroom scale ever made.

A good man might be hard to find, but a good hairdresser is next to impossible.

Why a phone call between two women never lasts under ten minutes.

AND THE NUMBER ONE THING ONLY WOMEN UNDERSTAND:

OTHER WOMEN!

The Intersecting Lines

This is a story of two young people, whose lives happened to cross at a point, nothing more and nothing less.

He was in the search of the meaning of his life; as any other human being, in his early twenties. He had the talent, hailed by the society,
but he himself wasn't confident of accepting it. He yearned for more,more of what he did not know. He asked questions such as he himself
could never answer. He did not know where the life would take him, and for that matter, did not even care. Sometimes, he found himself trapped
in the web that he himself had woven, inadvertently. The people around him noticed, praised and talked of him. And he quietly enjoyed the talk,
always wondering all this is for /who/?

She was a youthful bud. Free as in Freedom. Swift as a cloud on a windy day. Fluent were her thoughts as the turbulent blue waters of a stream
in the forest. Bright was she as the sunshine on a day in March. And how beautiful!

It wouldn't be odd if they met one fine day. But until and unless that actually happened, sentences such as those would be meaningless. What
would such two people find in common? Appreciation for one another! Strange are never the ways of fate, that they happened to meet one day.
Out of the blue. And later, they laughed over the matter of their first meeting, for they couldn't make out /why/ they had to meet.

Some things do not have any explanation. And some things do not need one.

The life continued its own course. Changing a bit here and there for the conveniences of these two. They spoke of many things. Of ideals, of
socialism, of books and of songs. Of rainbows, of fireflies, of sand-dunes, of stars they spoke. If it ever came to his mind, he never
spoke of the puzzle that was consuming very much of his processing power. And she never thought so much about it anyway. The time was
spinning its wheel, and perhaps his mind was being freed by her. She, life's perfect admirer, could appreciate and accelerate the talents he
had so far kept buried within himself (for no reason whatsoever). And he was aware of that. He, on the other hand could simply be amazed by the
reach of her mind, the depth of her thoughts, the heights of her imaginations. He knew he had found the meaning, finally.

There were long dialogues exchanged, funny things debated and laughed at heartily. The others around them continued to enjoy what these two were
offering them : joy! The weathers changed, the moon continued with its 15-day tours, the clouds came at the times expected and the rains poured
sooner. The flowers never missed the blooming season. Everything about everything was just too perfect. Including these two.

One may be forced to think that perhaps, then, these two were made for each other. But that's a different story. That may happen in some other
story, but not in this one. And that is not the point of the story after all.

The greatest adventure that life is, it miraculously brings out so uncountably many straight lines, some parallel, some intersecting, some
short, some ever lengthening. And a few merge and become one after a certain point. Many meaningless lines never intersect, not that they are
parallel but such a crossing never happens. And then there is no definition of parting for such lines too.

The geometry of life is not so straightforward.

The merry weather continued all the same. The stars shone on them and the moon cleared any darkness that was left in him. Time continued. Joys
overflowed. Breeze hummed, and trees swayed. And after such a wonderful length of time, the two lines departed. For no reason, as there was no
reason for there meeting. Without any emotion that can be described as sadness. Without shedding any drop of tear, without bidding any
goodbyes. Without any promises of meeting again. Perhaps, life simply and cruelly turned its attention to another such pair of unrelated lines.

It is probably not so important how these two lines fared later, but what is important is the point they left on each other's paths. A line
may be made up of infinite points, but not all of them can be so privileged as those of the intersection. Intersection, such as this.

Indeed, the geometry of life is not so straightforward. But then it is not pointless as well!

Content is Important, not the container

A group of working adults got together to visit their University lecturer. The lecturer was happy to see them. Conversation soon turned into complaints about stress in work and life. The Lecturer just smiled and went to the kitchen to get an assortment of cups - some porcelain, some in plastic, some in glass, some plain looking and some looked rather expensive and exquisite.

The Lecturer offered his former students the cups to get drinks for themselves. When all the students had a cup in hand with water, the Lecturer spoke: "If you noticed, all the nice looking, expensive cups were taken up, leaving behind the plain and cheap ones. While it is normal that you only want the best for yourselves, that is the source of your problems and stress. What all you wanted was water, not the cup, but we unconsciously went for the better cups."

"Just like in life, if Life is Water, then the jobs, money and position in society are the cups. They are just tools to hold/maintain Life, but the quality of Life doesn't change." "If we only concentrate on the cup, we won't have time to enjoy/taste the water in it."